I know what “nothing” means, and keep on playing.

Set against the backdrop of the glamorous Hollywood hills and the vast Nevada desert, Play It as It Lays, written by Joan Didion, unfolds the narrative of Maria Wyeth, a 31-year-old unsuccessful actress and model. The story delves into her contemplation of the events leading up to her nervous breakdown and subsequent institutionalization at a psychiatric facility. Maria’s days are consumed by aimless drives through the desert and meaningless social interactions, as she grapples with an elusive search for something beyond her current existence. In many ways, it reflects upon Joan Didion and her experience living in LA.

Most of the themes of Play It as It Lays lie in its unrelenting exploration of life’s inherent meaninglessness, and Maria’s unwitting entanglement in the games it plays. Amidst the deceptive facade of glamour and excess, the narrative echoes resonances of existential works like “The Stranger” and provides a unique perspective akin to “The Great Gatsby,” if it were viewed through the lens of Daisy Buchanan.

Maria’s mental unraveling serves as a reflection of the feminist movement of its time, cautioning against investing too heavily in transient pursuits. Didion reminds the reader that the pursuits of recognition and fame, fervently chased by its characters, inevitably fade as others step into the spotlight.

There is a very arid quality in all of the conversations throughout. The relationships between spouses and agents are all very phony. Didion perfectly weaves together through the dialogue a distant feeling of isolation. The metaphorical presence of snakes in the world becomes a poignant symbol, embodying both literal dangers and the nature of deceit. The cracks, dust, memories, and human connections, come out to nothing in the end. Yet, Maria must push forward, not because she wants to, but because she doesn’t know what else she wants.

The novel makes more sense with context to Didion’s own perspective to life particularly her own battles with anxiety and despair. The blanket of disillusionment that she crafts, made this book really difficult to read. The narrative unfolds with a strange warmth, gradually allowing the strangeness to seep in, creating an unsettling yet oddly familiar sense of alienation and distance.

Overall Rating: 7/10